Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Greetings from sick bay

I stayed home from work today because my throat is on fire. I had just been thinking last week about how healthy I'd remained all winter, never even so much as getting the sniffles. The last night after I got home I started feeling a tickle in my throat that slowly blossomed into full-fledged pain. My energy slowly started draining away and I knew I was hit by something.

I blame my trip to Whole Foods, where I got a little salad with tofu from the salad bar. That's the problem with any salad bar or buffet-type food: to get your food you have to touch utensils handled by the great unwashed masses, and you have no idea where their hands were before they touched those tongs. Even though I washed my hands before eating my little salad, I'm sure the damage was already done. Somebody passed me the crud. Bastards. Well I'm doing my part not to spread it around by staying home today ... although I think I should be drinking orange juice, so maybe a trip up to Whole Foods is in order ... but I won't go near the salad bar and I'll touch as little as possible.

But home is not necessarily a restful place, because Battlecat will not shut up. And Mr. Gomez thinks that I stayed home bcause I want to let him outside, let him inside, let him outside, let him inside ... etc. (Did I mention that I use him frequently as a example of training don'ts in my puppy classes? I'm always saying "As I know from experience, don't do X with your dog or you are setting yourself up for a life of Y bad behavior. Do Z instead and teach your dog good habits from Day 1.") Damn, he just saw another squirrel out the window and he's barking his fool head off again ...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lizzie would join Mr. Gomez in saying:

"you are the worst momma ever. I mean, what is this 'sick' business when the day is so beautiful and the evil squirrels are running. Is that any way to get the most out of life?"

"Just because my needs don't fit into your fascist structured human lives...dominated by 'work', 'chores' etc, doesn't mean you should label me with inferior terms. Jeez."

Lisa B. said...

I think you are confusing Mr. Gomez with a dog who is capable of forming complex thoughts in the form of complete sentences.

I think he's really thinking "Uhhhh, maybe woman gonna let me outside now. Yippeeee! Uhhh, maybe now. Yippeee! Uhhh, maybe now Yippeeee! ..."