Friday, July 06, 2007

Things I wonder about ...

I guess I don't have anything really interesting to say, so let's visit the department of Pet Peeves, shall we?

So let's say you're driving along on a two-lane road, and a cop turns onto the road and begins following you. You'd be retarded not to go the speed limit, right? Why then does the cop proceed to ride your ass? He knows you're going the speed limit because there's a cop behind you and you're not going to go any faster, right? Or is he retarded? Isn't riding someones ass considered a bad thing? Don't they tell us not to do it in the NC Drivers' Handbook? Here's what it says:
Following too closely is a leading cause of traffic crashes. Maintain plenty of space between your vehicle and the one ahead. If the car ahead stops suddenly, you will need time to react. On the open road, keep enough distance between you and the car ahead so that a passing vehicle can safely move into and occupy the space. Remember to follow the "two second rule".
Oh yeah, and when they're not riding someone's ass, Durham cops like to drive really, really fast.


Anonymous said...

can I add to that list? what really peeves me is their mustaches. (both male and female officers) never a good look. like ever.


i like that you are bringing back socially unacceptable verbage (ex: retard.)

I have been trying to bring back the term "cripple" but it hasn't really caught on.

: )

Seth said...

Funny story. I was 16 and had just got my license. My stepdad always taught me to tap the brakes to give a hint to the tailgating driver behind me to back off. Being a new driver tapping the breaks was a fine art to me, and I accidentally jammed on them. The tailgater, a cop in an unmarked car, rear-ended me. He wrote me a ticket, for what I don't recall.

In Indiana a rear-ending is always the fault of the rear-ender so my dad, the consummate attorney, said we were going to fight city hall. The judged expunged the ticket from my record, and fined the officer for failure to maintain appropriate stopping distance, and a seatbelt violation (pled down from reckless driving).

I don't know if you'd want to risk it, but it certainly worked out well for me. I still chuckle a little and think about it when troopers pull that crap.

Lisa B. said...

Burnt: My dad LOVED using the word cripple just to annoy people!

Seth--good work nailing the tailgating cop! I'd try the same thing but I so often have dogs in the car with me, and I don't want to cause them any stress or discomfort.

What I usually do when a tailgater annoys me is go a couple of miles under the speed limit just to really piss 'em off. But I'm afraid to try anything with a cop ... they're usually such assholes and they have guns--they'd probably go into a rage, shoot my dogs and then claim they were being attacked or some shit.

Phil said...

Seth's dad rocks.

I just got busted by a cop, but for perfectly good reason. Damn my stupidity. (But stay away from my moustache.)

andrew said...

In cockney rhyming slang cripple is "raspberry ripple" (an old fashioned favored ice cream flavor). So you might say something like "That cop was such a raspberry ripple". Or you could shorten it to just raspberry (the rest is then implied, a common usage in cockney rhyming slang): "That moustache makes that cop lokk like a complete raspberry".

The One-in-Eight Group - an organisation which aims to promote physically challenged people in the media - gives out awards for the best portrayal of such people on TV, in journalism etc, and they are called the Raspberry Ripple Awards